A Very Fiat Christmas

[ga.spyder]

A Christmas tradition here on FiaSpider.com

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and out in the shed
Sat a tired old FIAT, its battery dead

Its fenders were rusted, the floorpan had holes
The seats and the carpets had been eaten by voles

The tires had dry-rot, the gas tank was leaking
A turn of the wheel sent tie rods a-creaking.

So I put on my coat with a weight on my heart,
And went out to the shed to get it to start.

The engine turned over--there arose such a clatter!
I knew from the sound it was water pump chatter.

From under the dashboard there came a bright flash:
The wiring harness had just turned to ash!

“I’ve had it with Spiders!” I finally swore
“Enough is too much! I can’t take anymore!”

When what to my red, teary eyes should appear
But a little Italian (hell, I need a beer!)
“Buon giorno,” he said, poking me in the belly.
“You needa my help? I’m Gianni Agnelli.

“This one can be saved; there’s no reason to grieve.
All you need is some faith--Man, you gotta believe!

“A hammer! Some duct tape! Get me more tools!
When you work on these cars, just make up-a da rules!
We’ll get her cranked over—no way that she’ll stall
(But stand over there wit’ you back to the wall.)

A cough and a sputter, the cacophony stunning--
I couldn’t believe it! The damn thing was running!

The ghost winked at me and said, kicking a tire,
“Whatever you do, DO NOT TOUCH THIS WIRE!”

The old man then vanished amid sneezes and farts
But when the smoke cleared he had left me some parts.

So I opened the shed door and let the top down
Put pedal to metal and went out on the town.

And I thought to myself as I missed second gear
Merry Christmas to All and a Happy New Year!

[kilrwail]

Excellent as always Craig! Merry Christmas!

[kmoses]

That was great!

[ga.spyder]

I still get a chuckle every time I read it

[sergio1977]

this is wonderful. Love it!

[bonsaiwino]

Wonderful Craig! Thanks for the uplifting message!!

[FiatJim]

Thanks for bringing out the classic!

Merry Christmas to all, and safe motoring in the new year.

Jim Herzog

[rlmiller]

Thanks for the poem. I read, or rather tried to read it to my lovely wife. I got a smile that I translated to "that is very cute, but I don't understand why you are snorting and crying." Much the same response as when I tried to read Pat McManus to my 13 year old daughter as a father daughter bonding moment many years ago.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all ......

[Squidders]

LOL. Great poem. Merry Christmas.